Can't A Girl With Glasses Get A Break?
Crap-ola, my contact finally finished tearing this morning, and now I'm stuck in glasses, woefully so! I honestly feel like I'm handicapped, my sight just isn't right somehow. I feel off-balance and out of control. It's kind of a horrible feeling. Luckily, though, I'm dealing with my feelings of inadequacy by doing as little activity as possible and as much laying-around-reading-a-book as possible. Ha! Take that, you horrifying contraption stuck on my nose! You will not get the best of this gal, that's for sure!
Also, my parallel parking, which is stupendously horrendous to begin with, is now positively abyssmal, what with my lack of depth perception. Ah, the woes of me...

Flying Solo
So, I am now officially single, again. (You might have noticed how this is not some tragedy, as it is not the first thing on my mind these days....) One lessen I've (re-)learned: Relationships built for convenience never turn out to be at all convenient. Blast!
And now I am faced with that both terrifying and liberating status: single mother with two young children seeks loving revolutionary with whom she can live, laugh, love, fuck, and tear down the state. Now really, is that so much to ask for? I thought not.
Perhaps it's because I'm just newly single now, (but hopefully it's because I'm growing spiritually as a human being) but I'm not at all worried about finding someone to spend my life with, i.e. finding someone to keep me from being alone in my old, decrepit years. Since I tend to be such a hermit anyway, it's just not something I'm that worried about. I have complete confidence in being able to raise my boys as loving, compassionate, intelligent people, and complete confidence in being able to realize my wildest damn dreams. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure in about a month or two or five, I'll stumble into a slump, but I feel more able to cope with those now. Even though I'm only 26, I feel as if I've grown enormously in the past 3 years or so. I feel more confident in my skin, and even though I know I still have some more work and tons of learning to do, all prospects excite me right now. I know it's at least partly because I'm in a really great place right now, but I also know it's because I'm a stronger woman than I used to be.

On one last note, it's officially been 7 weeks since my last cigarette! WOOOO! I've been thinking about Borneo lately......

Africa On My Mind, and A Guatemala Story

Africa



So, my brain has been completely occupied with thoughts of Africa for the past week or so. This Africa obsession happens every couple of months or so, and now I guess the time has come again. It starts with me watching my Africa movie staples (Hotel Rwanda and The Constant Gardener), throw in a documentary or two (this time it was Wardance and Invisible Children) and I'm a total goner. I have a feeling I could easily fall in love with that continent. No, wait, scratch that; I'm already in love with that continent and I've never even been there.



I'll give you one of my favorite quotes, it originated with my professor in Dominica and I tweaked it a bit

"My heart is New Mexican, my rhythm is African, and my soul is Latin American." Seems to fit pretty well. And at first, I underestimated the rhythm part. Now, I'm pretty sure it's something much deeper, something primeval and essential.



Guatemala Stories, Part 2



When last my story left off, I was just descending into Guatemala City. My level of excitement was through the roof and I had a fire burning in me. The air felt different the second I stepped out of plane and into the airport. Let me just say here, if you've never been in an airport outside of the U.S., there is something very different about an airport in a developing/third world/whatever-you-wanna-call-it country. They're not as shiny and sharp as aiports in the U.S., you feel under less pressure, I think.



So, I'm walking through the hallways, trying to find the exit. I, of course, just follow everyone else, hoping that my destination is the same as the majority of the people who were on that plane with me. And then, at last! I see the exit doors, and holy crap. There are about a zillion people standing right outside the door, waiting for people, I'm guessing. My stomach knots slightly as I start looking for my pick-up. I've made "reservations" at a hostel in the city (Los Volcanes) and someone is supposed to be picking me up at the airport. I'm looking for a sign, my name, anything. I'm a ball of excitement and anxiety rolled into one, my body is litterly zinging with anticipation. And then, through the sea of brown humanity, there! A sign: "Hostal Los Volcanes". YES! Confidence returns and I drag my large, ungainly suitecase over to the guy holding the wonderful sign (this is the first of many times on my trip when I curse myself for not backpacking it). I smile, "Hola! Soy Krysten, are you waiting for me?" Oh crap, even my Spanglish sucks, with less "span" than "glish". The guy grins a shy grin, rattles something off in Spanish. Confidence is slowly leaking away but I keep my cool. This is who I am, I think to myself, a savvy, broad-minded, kick-ass gal who can confidently and compassionately find her way through any situation, even with (especially with) a language barrier. And then.....we just stand there.

I'm assuming we're waiting for someone, as this guy isn't leading me away to a comfy bed in a dorm. So we smile and grin at each other every now and then as we wait. I begin to feel to first edges of an uncomfortable situation creeping up, but I push it back, very determined not to let that Krysten out; you know, the one who let uncomfortable situations take her over, instead of enjoying a moment for what it is. And, wonders of wonders, I succeed! I close my eyes, breathe in Guatemala, and smile. I am here.

After a bit, I strike up a conversation with a girl who's asked for a lighter (see, there actually can be some benefits to smoking!), and find out that we're headed for towns that are like 2 miles from each other. She says she's working with a women's weaving coop, and I tell her that I think that's bad ass! (with exclamation point and all!)

Finally, after standing around about 15 minutes, another guy comes over, Spanish is exchanged with Spanish speakers, he smiles, says hello and leads me to a van. He and I manage to communicate, he (Tomas, by the way) with his bad English and me with my bad Spanish. I find out the first guy is his cousin, and Tomas works at the hostel.

Guatemala City is big and dirty, with bright colors everywhere, and a Kentucky Fried Chicken. (Ich, already??) I love it, every single bit of it. Already, I'm happy. Already, I feel comfortable. My soul feels at home. You know how it is, when you hear a certain song, or smell a certain smell, or see a certain cloudy sky, and you feel as if you've come, finally, to your home of all homes? Guatemala was that for me. And I'd only been there for 20 minutes.

Coming up next: Meeting Fellow Travelers, and "Heeeey, Guapas!"

Slacking and then some

I should have known, here I am already slacking at blogging like nobody's business. Go figure. Me, the girl who spent one year in Girl Scouts, one year in ballet, and on and on with various other hobbies.



Getting Pampered



My SO and I spent the weekend at the Ojo Caliente Spa north of Santa Fe, and let me tell you! There is nothing in this world like a 2 1/2 hour full body massage, that's for sure. This woman had the most amazing hands in the world, and I wanted to take her home like no other. Add to that a bit of lotus oil and I was a goner!



The mineral pools were awesome as well; I sat and boiled in them a while, though it wasn't nearly long enough. There were arsenic and iron cliffside pools that were fantastic at night under the stars with a back-lit cliff face....bliss..... The steam room made me particularly sweaty and happy, as I cannot abide saunas with their oven-like dry heat; gag!



The spa was basically surrouned by state and BLM land, so there were trails to hike, too, even though I was lazy and only went on a very short one before I retreated back to the indulgence of the pools. But really, who can blame a gal?? The trip was completely relaxing, totally indulgent, and glorious. Not to mention the fan-flippin-tastic food at the restaurant. Yes, it was a little bit o' heaven right here in the New Mexico mountains. If you're ever in the area, check it out; lodging on site is a bit pricey, but entry to the pools isn't too bad, especially if you want a bit of pampering. (I would have been just as happy at some of the completely unaltered hot springs back in the Gila Forest, but who am I to say no when someone else is paying?)

Going to Las Cruces

I found out last week that, yes, I will be living in Las Cruces this fall and starting grad school! Whoo! I'm pretty darn excited. I love Las Cruces, I love the professors that I've met so far in the anthropology department, and I love the possiblities that are hovering in front of me now! I'm also a wee bit terrified, but hey, I can deal with that.

My little guy, E, keeps saying he absolutely, positively does NOT want to move to Las Cruces. Which brings up the biggest issue I have: moving the boys away from from the grandparents (and moving myself away!). I'm pretty sure that's going to be the hardest part for all of us, considering that we've lived next door to them for the last 6 years..... We'll just have to tough it out. I know, I know, I KNOW that this will be completely worth it in the long run. It's kind of like the second step in getting us closer to that ambiguous world of wonderfulness; you know the one, where my kids and I are bi- or perhaps even trilingual, where we live, work, play, laugh, cry, and love in a community that values the real things that are important in life, and the one that is quite simply tropical. (The first step of course was my undergrad degree.) So......flippin......worth.....it.....